It is astounding how strongly I agree with these rankings from Lucas Kwan Peterson at the LA Times. I know it’s fighting words to slag on In-N-Out, but their fries really are dreadful:
And bringing up the rear is In-N-Out. Before you tell me there’s a way to “hack” these fries, or somehow make them better, either by loading them with American cheese and secret sauce, or by ordering them well-done, I will grant this: It certainly doesn’t make the fries any worse. Just as dumping the fries into a dirt pile on the shoulder of a highway access road and running over that pile with my car would also probably not make the fries any worse.